Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Much Ado About Nothing

Hey..psst.. it's me..Willie...

My silly human and her silly human friend the Funeral Home Chick (I'm serious as a heart attack - that chica talks to dead people.. ) along with Auntie Sue got in a big, giant, huge, fizz yesterday.


Medicine Mama and The Funeral Home Chick were going to lunch. I might add - I was not invited.. ahem..

Medicine Mama was in her typical running behind, trying to do three things at once and lost her train of thought state of mind. Lost? Truthfully her train of thought was derailed and  in a big wreck.

Of course the blame fell on me... it always falls on me. Sigh.. I'm glad I'm blocky, stocky, lab and have wide shoulders 'cause you humans sure pile it on me. Literally and figuratively. 

Truthfully - it is only partially my fault, and if they would have all just calmed down and stopped that silly human wailing and gnashing of teeth - I would have fixed it all. But I was seriously distracted by the utter chaos those three created in my house.

Just picture it - three adult (and I use that term loosely when it comes to this trio) women running crazed through the house ranting and raving about Medicine Mama's missing glasses. Evidently she really can't see so well without them. Seems they are indeed necessary - who was I to know this? Hmm did anyone tell me this ever? NO!

Now this is just my humble opinion, but if MM would clean house once every few years, things would be infinitely  easier to find when they are missing. I was amazed that Funeral Home Chick and Aunt Sue didn't point out that simple fact midway through the whole  "OMG WILLIE ATE THE GLASSES!"  trumoil I was subjected to.

It's simple.. I found them on the bathroom floor.

I picked them up and was headed to the desk with them when there was an uproar in the yard. Buddy and Dolly were howling and .growling and it was clear there was huge threat to security out there.

I was momentarily distracted.

I might have carried the glasses outside.

I might have put them in secure spot under the leaves on the back deck.

I did not eat them for heavens sake. I did not chew them up for heavens sake. I did not lose them. 

I'm not the one who carelessly left them on the bathroom floor. 

To her credit, MM kept telling me to find and fetch them up - but with all that crazy running amok and wailing and carrying on those three women were doing I simply could not concentrate or remember exactly where I left them - safe and sound mind you. I could remember they weren't hurt in anyway, so I truly still fail to see the big deal here.

Finally Mama sent the other two crazy ladies packing - resigned that she would be making the hour long trip to the eye glasses place to get a replacement pair.  HAH!

Did she really think I was going to let her drive  all that way? Especially since I had learned by then these glasses are big deal for her?

We had a little " come to Jesus" talk as she calls it (I call it a royal butt chewing thank you very much).

Okay fine - I see this is indeed a big honking deal. Fine. I trotted out to exactly where I left them. I fetched them up. I delivered them to hand. So there.

Now stop that wailing and gnashing of teeth would you ladies? It gets on my nerves.  

Later Gators.. going to try and scare up a bird or two..

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